Edith’s bright light sparkled a few years after she lit it. She was a great law scholar. Having gone through the best high school in Uganda and finally admitted to Makerere University for her bachelor’s degree, her future was nothing but bright.

When she was in University she met the man of her dreams, Samuel. He was not at that University, but he was a well-established businessman in eastern Uganda. They formed a relationship that led to the birth of their firstborn before her graduation. His name was Aggrey.

Edith’s father was a renowned post office master, and her mother was a teacher. They all lived in a small village in eastern Uganda. When they found out that their daughter was expecting a child, they were furious but nonetheless supportive of the situation. When Aggrey was born, Edith had to be enrolled at the law development centre for Uganda’s bar course. Juggling and balancing books and family wasn’t easy, but she wanted to prove to her parents she was capable.

Everything went well. She left Aggrey at her grandma’s house and went back to school. Samuel was to take complete care of Aggrey when Edith was not around, which he did. When she was done with school, that was when her marriage really started and things started getting real and extremely hard. Edith found out that Samuel another family. This was discovered only after she was expecting her second child. With so much disappointments, she gave birth to a bouncing baby girl Cynthia. Edith soon found a job in Kampala, the capital city of Uganda. She left Samuel and established herself and stayed with her two children and two of her brothers. However, Samuel kept looking after her and would come visit time to time. These visits resulted in the birth to Nickson and Macklin. When Macklin was born, Edith found out that Samuel had gotten infected. Macklin’s first birthday was also the day of her father’s burial. Soon thereafter, Edith found out that she was infected too. Three years later, the vibrant lawyer rested, leaving four children Aggrey 10 years old, Cynthia 8 years old, Nickson 6 years old and Me, Macklin 4 years old.

We were sent back to the village when our mother died. As children who grew up Kampala, we found village life a little different. Death has no time and that is why we had to deal with everything as fast and as best as we could. Our grandma, in the village did the best she could to raise us. We faced so many hurdles along the way as orphans but I know that it made us stronger.

With the help of our granparents, we grew up, got an education, got married, and had children.

Today, I am Macklin,  a wife, a mother, a farmer, a baker, a social worker an orphan and the result of the resilience of a single mother.

The post This one is for the single mothers appeared first on Sheevolves.world.

Most of us young people believe that being a good parent means having lots of money to be able to take care of your child. But that’s not the case. We are somehow consumed by the idea that money can raise a child. But we forget the key fundamentals of becoming a parent.

I had my daughter in my early twenties and it was the most difficult experience of life. Not only did I have to deal with becoming a first time mom. My parents were also not supportive of my situation. My dad chased me out of the house and I had to go live with my grandmother. Later on my mother joined me two weeks after giving birth.

Money was never a problem as my father gave me money to buy groceries when I went to live with my grandmother. However, the thought of being alone with my grandmother was also stressful. Mainly because I had never lived with her and didn’t know what that would be like. All I needed was my parents support more than anything else and they were just not there. With everything going on around me I found myself depressed and lost.

I knew I had made a mistake the minute I realized I was expecting. Falling pregnant was not such a big deal but the person who impregnated me made it difficult. Financially he provided but that’s all he did. The rest was up to me. I hated him for lacking to see what I was really going through. Because whilst he was living his life I suffered from post-natal depression and no one cared to notice not even him.

I felt like having a baby had cost me a relationship with my parents. To some degree I wished she had died or something like that. It was that bad. It was only after reading an article from a magazine that things started to get better. I could identify with the symptoms of PND. And I could see that I was seriously strained mentally. Awareness kicked in and I realized that I needed to change my way of thinking and how I generally viewed things.

A few months later I found a job and interacting with other girls my age, older and younger made a huge difference. I worked as a Brand Ambassador for Unilever so meeting up with other girls with similar situations to share experiences made me realize that I was not alone after all. The more I opened up, the easier it got. Suddenly I had a group of young mothers with different backgrounds and circumstances yet we had one thing in common…parenting. They became my support system because they understood what I was going through. As a young adult, a woman and a mother.

My daughter is now seven and each time I look at her, I realize just how far I’ve come. Having had to take responsibility for her is one of the hardest lessons I have ever had to learn. It made me take a deep look at myself. And I finally saw that I had a pattern of blaming and complaining without taking any sort of ownership for my own mistakes. This has now changed and I embracing my uniqueness. I am also accepting of my individuality and acknowledging my imperfections. It was these things that made me appreciate being a parent and start forming a strong and healthy relationship with my daughter

The post Being a single parent (My story) appeared first on Sheevolves.world.