My name is Thandi Promise Mashaba, I am 31 years old, a phenomenal woman and the founder of Focus Mamelodi Community NPO—a certified life coach and life coach for kids. I am fearfully and wonderfully made – a truth. I didn’t always believe in myself.

Growing up, life was not easy. From an early age, I was bullied because of things I couldn’t change: the colour of my skin and the depth of my voice. I was constantly mocked, ridiculed and made to feel like I didn’t belong. The bullying started in primary school and followed me into high school. I was called names and physically attacked. All this made me shrink inside. I struggled with my confidence. I constantly felt the need to defend myself or explain who I was. And because sometimes I fought back physically, I was often misunderstood and labelled as aggressive when in truth I was just trying to survive.

But everything began to change when I received salvation. That was my turning point. Through faith, I started doing inner work to heal my wounded inner child. I began to look at myself through a different lens- through the eyes of love, grace and peace.

I began to affirm myself with words like ‘I’m fearfully and wonderfully made’, knowing that I am not a mistake and that I have a purpose and a destiny to fulfill on this earth. Slowly, I started to believe it. I found my healing. I found my freedom. And with that healing came forgiveness- not just for me but for the people who hurt me, also for the parts of myself that I had rejected.

It was from this place of transformation that Focus Mamelodi Community NPO was born. I knew my story wasn’t just for me. I understood that through god’s grace, I could also help others see themselves beyond the limitations placed on them by society, bullies, or even their own insecurities.

Focus Mamelodi Community NPO became my way of mentoring and counseling teenagers and youth in my community, of telling them that no pain lasts forever, and that their identity is not defined by others but by the one who created them. Today, I embrace every part of who I am. I will never bleach my skin. I will never hide my voice. I no longer seek to fit in. I was born to stand out.

Message to the community:
To anyone going through bullying or struggling with self-acceptance, I want you to know this:
Do not change who you are for anyone
Do not silence your truth to make others comfortable, you are enough

Yes, the pain is real, but so is your power. When you forgive, you set yourself free. When
you speak life over yourself, you begin to rise. And when you believe in your worth, the
world cannot ignore your light.
Beauty isn’t defined by society or filtered by the world. True beauty is how you feel about
yourself- boldly, deeply, and unapologetically.

You can find me on these platforms
Email: thand.mashaba@gmail.com
Facebook: Thandi Thandy Thandie

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When I was in first grade, I was the only black girl in my class.

When I think about elementary school, I remember that I felt different. I was the only girl who was black and the only person who had skin like mine. And because of that, I was picked on by bullies.

It started with comments and looks, as if my very existence was something to question. I didn’t know why my friends treated me differently and made fun of my hair and skin colour. It hurt, and it made me wonder if I was worth anything.

Their words hurt like tiny arrows, cutting through my faith and leaving scars. They would make fun of me, call me names, and say nasty things about my appearance. Their lack of knowledge and understanding only made them more cruel.

I felt alone and alone at times. It seemed like no one could understand the pain I was in. I wanted to be accepted and feel like I belonged, but it seemed out of reach.

But in the middle of the darkness, I found a strength inside of me. I learned that their lack of knowledge did not make me who I was. I wouldn’t let what they said break my heart. I found comfort in the love and support of my family, who told me every day how valuable I was and pushed me to be myself.

I made friends with people I didn’t expect to, like peers who looked past the colour of my skin and accepted me for who I really was. Their friendship became a shield that kept me safe from all the bad things that were going on around me. Together, we made a friendship based on acceptance, respect, and kindness.

As I got older, I realized that their bullying came from their own feelings of insecurity and fear. They couldn’t see much beyond what they knew and what they had been told. But I didn’t let their stupidity make me who I was.

When I think back on my life now, I’m thankful for the things I’ve learned. I’ve grown into a strong, self-assured woman who is proud of her roots and sees the beauty in differences. I’ve learned to stand tall and know that my worth isn’t based on the colour of my skin or what other people think of me.

As the only black girl in elementary school, it wasn’t easy for me, but it made me who I am today. It taught me to care about other people, to be strong, and to love myself. It made me want to fight for inclusion and equality so that no other child has to go through what I did.

I want all black girls and boys to know that they are not alone if they have felt different or faced similar problems. You are strong, beautiful, and deserving of respect and love. Accept who you are and know that your opinion is important.

Slowly but surely, the world is changing, and I hope that in the future, variety will be praised and violence will be a thing of the past. Until then, let’s stand together, helping and pulling each other up and clearing the way for a better, more inclusive tomorrow.

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