If the past year and a half has taught us, it is that there is a lot of pain going around. With COVID, it feels like that pain is amplified and perhaps easier to see; From the reporting of COVID deaths, to news coverage of killings of people or color, asian hate and so much more, it can feel exhausting. But beyond the actual pain and grief we feel from having a loved one pass away. There is also the grief of losing something during COVID. Whilst most people associate grief with death, it is also an emotion that can be felt when something is lost.

Whether that is a friendship, a job, a feeling, a love, or anything else that you once had but no longer have. All these things can make anyone feel lost, confused and out of sorts. So how do you help someone dealing with grief? Whilst I would love to say there is one tried and true method. That would be a lie. Mainly because grief shows itself in so many different ways that sometimes its even hard to put your finger on it. But once you do it does become a bit easier to help someone through it. Before I share my tips and tools for dealing with grief, I thought I’d share some known signs and symptoms of it.

  • Irritability
  • Numbness
  • Lack of motivation
  • Bitterness
  • Constantly in their head
  • Inability to show or experience joy
  • Sadness
  • Agression

It is important to note that is with most things, grief has many ways of showing itself. And sometimes you just need to keep your eyes open to any changes to those around you to see if they are indeed grieving. With that being said, here are some tools to help either yourself or a loved one who is dealing with grief.

  1. Talk it out: Whilst this may be the last thing you want. Often talking about what is bothering you or on your mind can be a big help. It does not need to be a therapist or professional. But naming the thing that is making you sad can have a huge positive effects on your mental and emotional health.
  2. Go back to basics: Whilst doing the bare minimal may seem impossible when you are grieving. Finding ways to do the basics is important. For me when ever I find myself grieving, I try do three things that are the basics of my overall health. Things like working out, taking a shower and eating. Usually these three don’t take up much time and also mean that if I need to, I ca, climb back into bed. Or watch TV.
  3. Give yourself time: Like any emotion. Grief is not something you can run away from or wish away. So give yourself time to feel it. It’s only in giving yourself time to feel it and go through it that you can grow through it.

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