Written by: Admin_SheEvo
If you want to see change in the world, it should start with you. Then, you can even influence the community as a whole. I believe you decide what you want in life. I was raised in the Free State with my grandparents.
I didn’t receive much love from my parents. My grandparents tried to give me whatever they could. They could only afford the basic stuff, but it was good enough for me. My mom is an alcoholic, and my dad is in jail. Growing up knowing all those things is not a very easy experience for a young woman. I had to learn to be disciplined and responsible at a young age because I had to look after my siblings.
When l was in grade 10, my business teacher came to me and said, ‘ Prudence. With your attitude and your positive mindset, you can do anything. You are the light in your home, so don’t let anything or anybody switch that off.^ It really kept me going and really motivated me.
I did well in High school. I decided l am not going to make excuses for my life. I am not going to compromise my education for anything in this world. I will grab the opportunity even if it means staying in a shack in Johannesburg. My grandparents were worried when I left, but I knew I had to leave my village.
I found a place to stay with a woman I did not know. I started university, but things did not go so well. I had to quit. l was this person who was suicidal. I was in a foreign place. I had never been to Joburg. At university, you meet lots of people with different attitudes and lifestyles, and I feel like I am nobody. l would always have the question why me? It came to me so strongly. One day, l was sitting in my room. I had these vivid flashbacks to when I was young. I could see this person coming to me and doing this crazy thing to me. I was raped, but my parents don’t know about it.
That created this anger, and l decided l would not live like this. It really destroyed the person that l am. I had This anger towards men. Hearing that my dad was arrested because of rape destroyed me totally. I was like, why should I live? We say we are free, but we are not. As women, we fought for this freedom. Women went to the Union Building, marching for women to be free, but we are not free at all.
Men still take advantage and feel they can always do whatever they want and get away with it.
Why should l live like this? No one cared about me, and l decided to take my life.
Fortunately, my roommate came to my rescue. She took me to the hospital, and they did whatever they had to revive me. While in hospital, l had these amazing friends who came and spoke with me. They encouraged me. Something clicked, and my mindset changed. I told myself that I was not going to do this again. l have my grandparents who struggled to bring me up and to make me the woman that l am today so why should l take my life because of somebody. Why should l die because of somebody else’s mischievous actions? l was like it’s OK, Prudence; you are going to make it in life whether your parents are not there or whether someone violated you.
I decided to go back to university. I started meditating, which has helped give me peace and changed my perspective on life. l want to change this world. l want my voice to be heard because l am sick and tired of men who think they can come to a woman and do whatever they want and misuse power.
Despite everything I have gone through, l still tell myself that Prudence, as young and responsible and disciplined as you are, you can go far. You can bring change to the community.
l am so grateful for the life I am living right now.