Written by: Admin_SheEvo
Women! Mothers! Girls! I never knew the depth of these until I lived all the three.
I am a final student at one of the universities in Uganda. I gave birth to a healthy baby boy in my second year at the University. Everything changed since then. After my boyfriend found out about the pregnancy, he changed. Threatening he would take away my baby because I am a terrible woman, he wanted me to abort and I refused. He decided to leave me, saying the baby ain’t his. I took care of myself and my baby, went to a good hospital for antenatal. With support from a few friends and myself of course.
After my parents found out, they abandoned me too, mad at me, and everything in between, especially after giving birth. I remember my father chasing me out of his house calling me a prostitute and all sorts of names. I desperately wanted to go back to school, he (dad) put a condition that for me to go to school, the parents of my boyfriend have to talk to him. I tried reaching out to the guy but he totally refused. He came around after I had delivered. I got a chance to steal his father’s number from his phone and contacted him, that’s how he came to know of my existence and the baby.
The baby is turning two in a few months but his father’s family has never seen him, or sent any sort of help. A few months, we parted again, I couldn’t let my son go. Dad finally accepted to send me back to school, I vowed to make it count. I would illegally sneak my son into school until I was caught and went away with a warning (University non-residents ain’t allowed in resident halls,, especially not with babies) In this case, I had violated a number of university rules, I had a baby, yet unmarried and sneaked him into the university hall which was the other.
I decided to start foregoing some lectures and attend a few if possible. 95% chances were that it was an impossibility, but I held on. I asked neighbours to stay with the baby (very tender and breastfeeding). I would rush back to feed him every now and then. I made it through my second and third year to my fourth year.
My baby has always been with me. His father stopped coming around, not even checking on the baby, I still buy everything he needs and take perfect care for him. I am almost sitting my final exams but I am scared as I was caught for the second time in the halls of residence and might face an expulsion from the institution
All in all, I am grateful for what I have become. It’s tough, it’s hard, it hurts, it’s painful, I get hopeless sometimes but beating myself up isn’t the solution. I still get up and move. I have no job, I am still studying and I still have to provide for my son.
In Uganda, I am seen as a mature woman. My parents are correct, I made a mistake. But it was a perfect decision and I can’t regret giving my son a chance to love, to be happy, and experience the sun and the moon and the rain, the birds, nature, people, etc.
My last words are, to everyone in a tough situation, you’re not done yet. Personally, this was my first half, I still have a long way to go and I shall walk through it because to me, motherhood is a badge of honor.
