Written by: Admin_SheEvo
Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with me.
Do these words come from my heart or my mind?
Each time they spill, I flinch,
shocked by the stranger inside my skin.
I keep finding pieces of myself I never knew existed,
fragments so jagged, so cruel,
I would bury them in the ocean if I could.
Is this the love I’m meant to settle for?
Is this how we survive
by stitching wounds with trembling hands,
pretending the needle doesn’t pierce us both?
I trace our past like a fading map.
Do you remember?
The way we walked, hand in hand,
through streets that felt like forever?
Your fingers laced in mine,
our laughter brighter than the dawn.
We were a bonfire in the desert, love
untamed, unyielding, burning.
For years, we roared.
Then, flicker by flicker,
The light began to dim.
Now, only embers remain.
Some days, I cup them close,
begging the wind not to steal you from me.
Other days, I want to scream:
Shut up, love. Shut up and come back to life.
God knows I’ve prayed.
Prayed for this ache to vanish,
prayed for it to strengthen me instead.
Each time I think we’re closer to water,
to the stream that could save us,
The sand shifts again.
And I’m left wondering:
Is this the moment the light began guttering out?
I can’t bear the thought.
Not losing your voice in the morning,
The way you grumble before coffee,
The way you still buy me plants
even though I almost always accidentally kill them.
Not of losing the weight of your arms around me,
Your plum chest, soft like some sort of bio-cushion, is the only therapy I’ve ever needed.
I can’t bear the thought.
Not of growing old without you
wrinkled, ridiculous,
still bickering over lemon and honey shots.
How could I?
You are my home.
Even now, even after everything,
You are the one I want to come home to
The only one I want to do pillow talks with.
By: Anonymous
